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War Machine Prison Diary 2012: Week 33

In his latest prison diary entry War Machine argues that punching people in bars doesn’t make you a criminal because the heroes in the movies always do it, and because some army dude says it’s good for team-building.

If only he had expressed this foolproof argument in court he would surely have got off scot-free!

“Verily, I have often laughed at the weakling who thought themselves good because they had no claws.” -Nietzsche

Yeah, I used it already, but it’s my favorite. “It takes a bigger man to walk away.” -Someone with no balls, who had no other choice in his heart BUT to walk away, coined that phrase. Cowards like him don’t walk away in their dreams though; in their dreams they fight just like the heroes they grew up watching on TV and reading about in books, which brings up an interesting point – Since the recent emasculation of American men, how come Hollywood hasn’t changed the role of the “good guy” in films to: he who walks away? I still see the hero kicking ass on TV but don’t see anyone labeling him a felon and taking away his freedom. They can lock me in this shithole 1 year, 2 years, 10 years, and they still won’t convince me that I’m a “criminal” or that “real men” walk away.

My dad was a cop and I grew up around him and all his friends and a lot of stories. When they told stories about “bad guys” it was always a reference to rapists, killers, thieves, kidnappers, drug dealers, etc. I don’t recall them ever once complaining about the horrible criminals that participate in bar fights. Then again I can recall, more than once, them coming home AFTER being in bar fights themselves, but maybe they were “dirty cops.” Once he died, I obtained a gym full of surrogate fathers, just so happened that lil’ gym was full of cops, firemen, and ex-military. Guess what they always told stories about – war, and getting in bar fights with their buddies. But maybe none of them were heroes at all, and were really just arch criminals like me. One of those “arch criminals” was a ‘Nam era SEAL who became my mentor – you know what – all SEALs must be criminals, and not heros, ’cause all my current SEAL buddies get in bar fights constantly. I read a book last term on the formation of SEAL Team 6 by Richard Marcinko. You know what he said he used as the best way to build camaraderie amongst his recruits – bar brawls! Wow, who would have thunk it, all our nation’s heroes are really “criminals” – someone should do somethin’ about that. Don’t you worry though because I will walk away the next time I’m in a situation (hopefully no one punches me in the back of the head); but it definitely won’t be because I’m attempting to “be the bigger man,” no, it’ll be the same reason why any real man makes a choice as unnatural as walking away: to stay out of trouble. Undoubtedly I’ll go home and cry for an hour out of pure shame and rage (just like I did the 2 times I walked away from assholes in between these 2 jail sentences – no one punched me in the head, but one of them did flick a lit cigarette at it), but no one should worry about that.

No, society should only take care of those whose fight or flight instinct is the latter and to hell with the rest. Am I a part of the only group that is persecuted because of the way we were born? Gays, handicapped, all races, etc. have their rights and cannot be treated unfairly simply because of how nature made them, but if you were born with the fight or flight instinct that favors fight, you’re shit-out-of-luck? Man, FUCK this country. Fuck what it has done to its MEN. I’d do anything to be able to forfeit my citizenship and leave the very day I get released. Once my probation is over I’m fuckin’ out of here. Off to a land where a criminal is a criminal and where “boys will be boys” – rowdy, just the way God intended us to be.

I will get back up.”

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